Merry Christmas

I have never like Christmas.  My memories of the holidays are full of hurt and fear.  The lights, the snow, the gifts all create an anxiety in my that I cannot shake.  Often, when visiting my wife's family, I would go hide out in my room and just try to endure the festivities.  I have been this way since I was a boy.  And I thought it would never change...

Two years ago I spent Christmas away from home.  Angie and I were in India.  We were in a Hindu country, and no one cared that December 25th was approaching.  Everything that marked the season for me was gone.  No Christmas music.  No red and green.  No sales, no shopping, no wrapping paper, nothing.  No snow, no trees, no politics over which store is afraid to say the word, nothing.  It was like Christmas didn't exist. 

But in our little church, on a dirt road in the middle of nowhere, a band of Dalits who loved Jesus were preparing to celebrate.  I have no idea how Christmas got all the way out here, why the day is the same.  But it is.  And for the first time in my life I was able to see Christmas stripped of most everything American.  It wasn't about family, or food, or the exchange of gifts.  It wasn't about giving, or getting, or parties, or even kindness.  It was about one thing and one thing only; Jesus!

Now, that Christmas was difficult.  We lost our child only a week before our big Christmas service.  It left us hollowed out and in mourning.  You would think that this would only serve to further my disdain for this holiday.  But the opposite happenend.

When stripped of all the pretense, I for the first time really saw what Christmas was all about.  I worshipped Jesus with my Indian brothers and sisters and that hurt didn't go away, but it was eclipsed.  My memories, our lost baby, being in a foriegn land, all that was lost in the crescendo of human history.  Christ was born.  Hope had come.  God stooped down.  We are not alone.

So, Christmas is here again.  Tonight I am going to do the obligitory family stuff.  And I find myself not kicking or screaming.  I am actually smiling.  I know who I am in Christ, I know what I am celebrating, the good God of all creation has brought good news of great joy to my life.  

Merry Christmas everyone. 

Comments

[Mr. Bob]

Excellent post, Ernesto; so well written, as always. Merry Christmas!